Signs of the Times

“...Bereavement ministry is a special lay outreach to console and support individuals who are mourning the death of a loved one. ”

An extensive development within the Catholic Church in the United States since Vatican Council II has been the spread of bereavement ministry in the nation’s parish Bereavement ministry, the closing acts of compassion for those who have recently died, and their loved ones, is now exercised widely and movingly throughout the American Catholic Church.

Catholics have long been admired for the care they extend to their recently departed. It has often been acknowledged that to live as a Catholic is often most difficult, but to die as a Catholic is most often to die with hope and peace. What ever the truth contained in that statement it was generally accepted in the past.

Today the situation is far more complex. Fewer and fewer people are dying supported by the full scale of rites the Church provides for that passage. It is the rare Catholic family that calls for the presence of a priest at the last moments of a family member’s life. Moreover, when the family does make arrangements for a funeral Mass for the deceased, it is most often painfully obvious that most of the family members in attendance have not been present at any Mass in years, and the rite is totally unfamiliar to them. It is simply one of the final things they do for good old mom or dad, a final religious form of saying farewell.

At the same time, more and more lay members of the parish community to which the deceased belong are making efforts to mark this death, this passing, as important and significant. The local participating disciples of Jesus who participate in bereavement ministries are both insuring the efficacy and vitality of this sacrament and exhibiting the responsibility they possess as baptized disciples of Jesus for the good of the Church and each of its members.

Specifically, these folks oversee the entire range of activities associated with the death of a parishioner. These include providing transportation to and from airports, bus stations, etc., making housing arrangements for out-of-town individuals and families attending the funeral rites, and similar acts of graciousness, as well as attending to the personal and religious needs of members of the family who have been deeply affected by the death of one of their  own. In addition, they usually provide a luncheon for all attendees following the funeral rites. In a word, they provide every imaginable service a family might require.

In most parishes, this ministry is completely maintained by volunteer members of the parish. Their numbers, imagination and energy allow them to provide a broader range of service and a more truly human range of responses that was possible, in the past, for even the more caring of priests. In bereavement ministries we have an example of better service to church  members through the participation of willing and capable lay people.

As one pioneer worker in this ministry has put it: Bereavement ministry is a special lay outreach to console and support individuals who are mourning the death of a loved one. Bereavement ministers represent the parish community by offering a gently, supportive, non-judgmental presence when assisting family to plan funeral liturgy(s) and guiding them through t1he funeral Mass. (Hospitality plays a big part in this, as we are frequently the first contact for some family members after being distanced from the Church for many years).

Thus, in and through this ministry, Catholic Signs of Hope emerge. Herein, we find an infusion of imaginative responses to a situation that is otherwise dimless. That is due, in large part, to lay people taking the initiative and exercising intelligence and compassion, not only to make a bad situation tolerable, but  actually to help individuals in dealing with it.